In the Name of the King – A Dungeon Siege Tale: I was looking for a cheap movie to waste some time at an airport, and I think I paid too much. Based on the “Dungeon Siege” game, which I freely admit I have never played nor know much about, this fantasy film is intensely derivative of other films in the same genre, in particular “Lord of the Rings” (the soundtrack sounds like outtakes from LOTR), and “Willow”, amongst others. Jason Statham is the imaginatively named Farmer (who is, guess what? A farmer). He is a simple man whose village is attacked by the Kurg and his son is killed and his wife is kidnapped. So he ventures forth to get her back. Statham is aided and abetted by a cast that includes Burt Reynolds, Claire Forlani, Matthew Lillard, John Rhys-Davies, Ron Perlman, Ray Liotta, and LeeLee Sobieski (who I’ve always thought was pretty terrible and here is no exception). Most of them are over-acting their respective rears off, with Lillard and Liotta particularly terrible here. Reynolds’ performance displays his full cognizance that, by being in this movie, he is indeed polishing a turd. Most of the dialogue is clichés of the worst kind and dumb. The plot is terribly, horribly contrived (for example, ropes breaking randomly at just the right moment for no reason at all). There are various poorly staged action set pieces, including one bit where tree people descend on vines looking like extras in Cirque de Soleil that is so goofy it’s laughable, mixed with dopey comedic bits. Even in HD, the film looks cheap (which is odd, as the budget was $60 million). Woodchuck sez, “Pootastic.”
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