Eye Candy #330 - "The Devil's Tomb"

The Devil’s Tomb: For the life of me, I can’t figure out how so many good actors ended up in this hooey. A US special forces team is dispatched to a remote desert lab that has lost contact with the outside world, on a snatch-and-grab run. Turns out the scientists at the lab unburied something that shouldn’t have been unburied (I can hear you groaning with familiarity at that old chestnut) and once underground, the special forces team finds itself fighting zombie-ish creatures, each other, and a being who may either be the Devil or a little gray man. For a cast, we get Cuba Gooding Jr. (acting with the same wooden quality he seems to display in all his direct-to-DVD offerings), Ron Perlman (who must have had about a day’s worth of shooting), Ray Winstone (Ray! What the hell are you doing here?!), one of the London twins (Jason, who gave us the relatively good “Out Cold”) and Stephanie Jacobsen, acting on a set that looks like the steam tunnels of a generic warehouse in east Los Angeles, with $1.15 for their special effects budget. Quite frankly, it’s a better cast than this script deserves. Directed by Jason “All I’ve Got Going for Me Is My Famous Dad” Connery, this movie is worthless. Now is apparently the time to be a Hollywood screenwriter, as there is a large quantity of horrible, derivate, and boring crapola making its way to your rental counter. Woodchuck sez, “Avoid completely. In fact, if Cuba’s output doesn’t improve any time soon, I’d recommend avoiding all his direct-to-DVD titles henceforth.”