Eye Candy #162 - "12 Rounds"

12 Rounds: After one of the worst film experiences in my life with “The Marine”, I was understandably hesitant to check out John Cena’s latest cinematic offering. These WWE films are all across the board in terms of quality, so you never quite know what you’re going to get. But I like director Renny Harlin, though he seems to be on the downside of his career, and while his films won’t be great feats for the mind, they are great time-wasters. John Cena here is New Orleans PD detective Danny Fisher who, by a combination of determination and dumb luck, captures a wanted international Irish terrorist Miles Jackson (played by “The Wire’s” Aiden Gillen). However, in the process of apprehending Jackson, Jackson’s lady love is hit by a speeding truck and killed. Vowing revenge, Jackson is sent to prison. Almost exactly a year later, he escapes to wreak havoc on Fisher, his own lady love, partner, and the city of New Orleans in general, through a series of challenges that Fisher must complete if he ever wants to see her again. Sure the film has some problems: 1.) its portrayal of the denizens of New Orleans is unflattering (they all look shabby and/or poor, and for whatever reason, NEVER yield to emergency vehicles); 2.) the plot reveal is needlessly elaborate (a heist as imagined by Rube Goldberg) and has holes you can drive a streetcar through; 3.) shaky handi-cam galore that makes it hard to follow some of the scenes; and 4.) you’ve really seen this all before done better in other films, like “Speed”. But it was still a VAST improvement over “The Marine” and I have no regrets with watching this one. Woodchuck sez, “One of the better WWE films.”